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  • Still at the Fountain (Family, Petra, A.I. and Project Update)

    Still at the Fountain (Family, Petra, A.I. and Project Update)

    “Oh give thanks to the LORD, for He is good, For His lovingkindness is everlasting.”

    — Psalm 107:1 (NASB 1995)

    A Trip to See Petra with Family

    I had the wonderful opportunity this weekend to see the Christian rock band Petra live in concert in Milford, Ohio, at a church called House of Restoration.

    The nine-hour trip was made with my younger sister and mother on the occasion of my mother’s recent birthday and our shared appreciation for Petra and the way God has used their music in our lives.

    This was my very first time seeing the band in concert, and my younger sister’s first introduction to the band and their music.

    Spoiler: She loved it! In fact, a new word has been added to her limited vocabulary. She now keeps saying “Petra.” Mission accomplished.

    I wanted to mark the occasion and express my thankfulness to the Lord for His wonderful kindness. As the refrain in my favorite Psalm 107 goes:

    “Oh give thanks to the LORD, for He is good, For His lovingkindness is everlasting. Let the redeemed of the LORD say so, Whom He has redeemed from the hand of the adversary.”

    My mother and sister are two incredible blessings of God to me. My mother has been a steady encourager throughout my life and an example of remarkable perseverance and patience, having raised seven kids. My sister likewise is a blessing, a bundle of continual joy and silliness.

    It was such fun to have a weekend together that culminated in an awesome time of worship and rock!

    I also feel fortunate that God has blessed me over many years through the music of Petra. I count their music as having made a significant impact on my faith and even as one of the inspirations for this project.

    It was wonderful to finally see them in concert after roughly 30 years of listening!

    I even got to shake hands with each of the current band members and say thank you as part of a very affordable VIP meet-and-greet package.

    I was very nervous.

    It was pretty cool! They were all very kind, and I was grateful for the opportunity to express my appreciation.

    An Unexpected Blessing: A Question Asked and Answered

    A few days before the concert, House of Restoration provided an opportunity for everyone who purchased VIP tickets to submit a question for the band to answer as part of a live recording of a podcast episode.

    I would guess there were at least 60 people at the VIP event before the show. The email explained that all submitted questions would be reviewed and that submitting a question was no guarantee it would be asked.

    Naturally, I took the opportunity!

    Given my project and my appreciation for Petra, I was eager to hear their thoughts on artificial intelligence and AI-generated music, particularly in relation to Christian faith and worship.

    I had been thinking about the parallels between some of the objections Christians have raised about AI-generated music and the objections Petra themselves encountered when they began using rock music for Christian ministry.

    In fact, Petra’s own website reflects on their history of encountering Christians who said rock music could not be used for the Lord or for worship. I wondered whether their experience might offer some wisdom for thinking through the present discussion.

    As it turned out, in an extra blessing, Pastor Brian Shuttleworth of House of Restoration graciously selected my submitted question as part of the interview!

    And here is another reason for me to be thankful. I appreciated the simple blessing of having my question considered and discussed by members of one of my favorite bands.

    Perhaps in the future I will do the responsible and scholarly thing and carefully break down what was said, when, and by whom, and offer a little written commentary and consideration of my own.

    A lot was covered in a short space, with grace and humor, and I am excited to revisit it. I thought they offered some good thoughts, and I look forward to hearing the discussion again.

    [Assuming video is posted online, I intend to provide a link to it here in this blog article.]

    Update 10/14/2026. Here it is!

    Overall, I find the entire topic of AI, music, and faith fascinating.

    From my seat as a non-musician, techy sort of guy, I perceive that at this particular moment in history we have two rather unique worlds of Christian creative exploration coming together (some may say colliding!): the music side of the house and the techy side of the house.

    This creates some interesting opportunities to explore how God works through people and how we are each wired a little differently for the good works He has prepared for us.

    Of course, I don’t expect us all to agree on everything about what is happening right now with AI, the nature of AI itself, or the nature of AI-generated music.

    But with love, humility, and a willingness to listen, I think we have a special opportunity to press further into the upward call of God in Christ Jesus and grow together in our knowledge of the Son of God as we mature as His church.

    It is my hope that the question and the band’s responses give this discussion a little more room to grow, with some input from folks I know to be thoughtful people.

    As for the experience itself, I think I was somewhere near what people call cloud nine.

    And then came the concert. That was about cloud ten.

    And getting to experience all of this alongside two of the coolest people in my life?

    I may have reached some kind of simulated third heaven. LOL.

    October 11, 2026 — Project Update

    I suppose I am due for a bit of a status update on the Augustinus Vox project and the upcoming Monica album.

    Monica and More Than She Asked

    In case you weren’t already aware, we recently released a simulated live version, or as we like to call it, an ALIVE version, of a song titled More Than She Asked.

    AUGUSTINUS VOX // NOW PLAYINGMore Than She Asked (ALIVE in Des Moines Version)0:00 / –:–

    Open in Music App

    The upcoming Monica album will feature the studio version of this song.

    The setting for the ALIVE version is our very own Des Moines, Iowa.

    For me, Des Moines is my Jerusalem of sorts, my immediate context. I enjoy dedicating my robot music to the place that has so shaped and blessed me. VOX001 and the rest of the robot band seemed to really enjoy it, too.

    The song grew out of another question I had been considering: What might have been Monica’s favorite Bible verse?

    That question led me back to Augustine’s account of his mother’s joy at his conversion and his reference to God’s ability to do far more than we ask or imagine.

    That said, I think we are still some time away from releasing the full Monica album. I am giving it some room to breathe while exploring other sides of the project.

    Monica, or Saint Monica as some know her, is a pivotal person in Augustine’s life, and he has much to share about his mother, especially in Book 9 of his Confessions.

    As such, I have quite a few songs for this album.

    And, as happens with AI tools, things change fast!

    The editing tools Suno provides have progressed to the point where I can now make actual word changes to songs without the entire song getting messed up. This is a wonderful development!

    I think the newer studio tools will allow me to finalize the remaining tracks and make some decisions about the album’s final selection.

    I also wanted to allow more room for different creative angles.

    This additional time for consideration has helped me develop five more tracks to explore, including a song about Augustine’s reflections on his mother’s wisdom, drawn from their time at Cassiciacum; one about the elderly servant woman who positively influenced Monica when she was a child; another, called Still at the Fountain, that tries to capture Augustine’s reflections on his mother’s church attendance and devotion, which I think offer a wonderful Christian example; and, of course, More Than She Asked, concerning Monica’s reaction to Augustine’s conversion.

    There is also a revisit of what I like to imagine may have been one of her favorite hymns of Ambrose, which we call Creator of All.

    AUGUSTINUS VOX // NOW PLAYINGCreator of All0:00 / –:–

    Open in Music App

    Still at the Fountain — A Song in Consideration

    Of those songs, Still at the Fountain has been especially on my mind since the Petra concert.

    It draws inspiration from Augustine’s reflections on his mother’s devotion and her relationship with Ambrose, the bishop of Milan.

    Augustine initially came to hear Ambrose preach largely because he was interested in his skill with words. His attention was first drawn to the eloquence of the speaker rather than the truth being spoken.

    Monica, on the other hand, already loved the Lord and eagerly received the teaching of the Church. Augustine tells us of her affection for Ambrose and the role he played in his journey toward faith.

    In the song, I wanted to explore something about Monica’s continued hunger for God’s Word. Here was a woman who had walked faithfully with the Lord through many difficulties, yet she was still eager to listen, still learning, and still growing in faith.

    She had not reached some point where she no longer needed to be taught.

    The chorus puts it this way:

    Still at the fountain
    Still humble, still made new
    The deeper that she walked in faith
    The more she thirsted for You

    I love that idea. The longer we walk with Christ, the more we might come to recognize just how much we still have to learn and receive from Him.

    It is a song about Monica, certainly, but also something of a prayer for all of us.

    It remains one of the songs under consideration for the album, but I thought it would be fun to share it here, especially given how this weekend brought it back to mind.

    Listen to “Still at the Fountain” on Suno · Monica album draft

    AI Experiments, Studies, and Some Unexpected Discoveries

    In other news, I took a full dive into a top-tier AI plan for a couple of months and paired that with the use of some open-source AI tools.

    Back in August, I had arrived at an interesting place where I felt I had so many ideas that were continually getting held back by usage limits.

    Since I feel like I meet God here in this project, and that He is teaching me through it, I decided a little leap-of-faith experiment was in order.

    So I committed some additional disposable cash to exploring the limits of these tools.

    The result?

    I built out the study app, developed a radio pilot, translated numerous works of Augustine and Ambrose with AI assistance, and generated audiobooks from many of those translations.

    I also added some rather silly pages to the website.

    I believe I now have enough translated content to keep me exploring for a few years, and I hope the study tool will help with that exploration.

    It is kind of wild to think about everything that has come together in such a short period of time.

    These tools really do augment creative ideas.

    I even went down a little textual rabbit hole, exploring how to display the provenance of ancient texts so I could trace my own AI-assisted translations backward to actual Latin sources, and potentially further back to surviving manuscript witnesses.

    There is always another door to open.

    Check out Against the Academics in the study app to see more of what I mean.

    That particular rabbit hole also led me to an intriguing discovery: there is a manuscript containing what some scholars have suggested may actually be surviving handwriting from Augustine himself!

    It is a fascinating possibility, though not something we can claim with certainty. I added a note about this possible Augustine autograph near the top of the Support page.

    I love these kinds of unexpected detours. You begin working on one thing and suddenly find yourself learning about ancient manuscripts, the transmission of texts, and how scholars try to determine what someone actually wrote more than 1,600 years ago.

    Augustine, the Catholic Church, and a New Album Experiment

    I also began working ahead into Augustine’s On the Morals of the Catholic Church and generated a draft album inspired by the work that I really enjoyed.

    It is a fascinating treatise Augustine wrote after his mother’s death, as he was examining his former religious convictions in light of his newfound faith in Christ.

    The work is commonly paired with another treatise called On the Morals of the Manichaeans.

    Manichaeism was the religious system Augustine had followed before his conversion to Christianity.

    One of the major aims of these works, as I understand them, is to contrast the Christian moral life with the teachings of Manichaeism. What especially stands out to me in On the Morals of the Catholic Church is Augustine’s emphasis on living a life of love in Jesus Christ.

    And yes, he is also correcting some of his old religious buddies along the way!

    I did have to pause for a moment over the word Catholic in the title.

    I am aware that those of us from Protestant backgrounds can sometimes get hung up on that word to the point that we never engage with works like this.

    I think that can be a modern Protestant problem stemming, at least in part, from a lack of familiarity with our own history.

    Augustine was writing long before the Reformation, and understanding what he meant by the Catholic Church requires entering his own historical and theological setting.

    So, if that title caught you off guard, perhaps it is a good occasion for a little education!

    The ALIVE Experiments

    Additionally, I keep tinkering with simulated live albums.

    To me, these are a really fun way to learn and engage with the material beyond the music itself. The tools continue to improve, making these experiments more and more possible.

    My idea is to provide multiple ways for people to engage with the material, depending on what suits them best.

    Augustine can be a bit of a challenge to read and understand, so I think it is helpful to provide different entry points.

    I have been imagining something of a progression: someone encounters a song, visits the song page to learn about its meaning and inspiration, perhaps reads a study article, and then eventually explores the audiobook or original text to dig a little deeper.

    The ALIVE versions are something of a fusion of these different experiences.

    They bring together music, storytelling, historical context, humor, and reflection in a way that I find especially enjoyable.

    I really do think of these versions as something like peak Augustinus Vox.

    Below is a sample of my most recent experiment in this vein. I thought it turned out rather well though with some areas for further improvement.

    Against the Skeptics — ALIVE in Des Moines playlist cover ALIVE EXPERIMENTAgainst the SkepticsALIVE in Des Moines · Draft 6Listen on Suno

    And Then There Is Minecraft…

    In sillier news, we have also started exploring how to bring our robot experiment into other media.

    You may have noticed the game section on the website.

    Well, I sort of went off the deep end there.

    I created what amounts to an Augustinus Vox and Augustine-themed amusement park inside Minecraft.

    What began as a friend’s request for a Minecraft server for some youth in our church youth group somehow turned into a full-blown, silly adventure involving amusement park rides inspired by the project and the life of Augustine, at least up to the point we have explored so far.

    The world comes complete with little “Mini Vox” robots, as I call them, who wander around saying lines from our songs.

    They even swim in the ocean.

    There are rides, themed attractions, a giant Vox statue, and an even bigger glowing cross.

    I also included a small, touching tribute to my late friend, whom we called The General.

    His unexpected death, and my reflection on his life in the midst of grief, were significant catalysts in moving forward with the Augustinus Vox project. I wanted to remember him in this strange little world as well.

    One of the amusement park rides even culminates in a full-blown robot concert where Minecraft versions of the band perform one of our ALIVE songs to an audience of anthropomorphic household appliances, CRT monitors, and other robots.

    Yes, you read that correctly.

    I intend to share the world so folks can join in and explore it themselves.

    It is a really silly thing, honestly, but I also think it is educational and, in some places, even touching.

    I tested it out with my brother and nephew, and despite a fair number of bugs, they seemed to really enjoy themselves.

    At least when they weren’t busy destroying the attractions.

    I keep wondering whether there might be something here worth exploring further in terms of creating shared experiences around the project.

    Who knows?

    Still at the Fountain

    As I reflect on this past weekend and everything that has been happening with the project, I keep coming back to that song, Still at the Fountain.

    It was watching Petra perform that brought it especially to mind.

    Here were these guys, decades into their musical journey, still playing rock music, still singing about Jesus Christ, and still demonstrating such a wonderful enthusiasm for worship.

    After all these years, they were still at it!

    And what a joy it was to see.

    There I was, some 30 years after first listening to their music, enjoying the songs with my mother, watching my younger sister discover Petra for the first time, and feeling something of that same joy I had experienced so many years ago.

    It reminded me of what I had been trying to express in the song about Monica.

    Here was a woman who had walked with the Lord for many years, endured hardship, prayed persistently for her son, and yet still came eagerly to hear God’s Word.

    She had not exhausted the goodness of God. She was still thirsty for more of Him.

    The bridge of the song expresses something I hope will be increasingly true of my own life:

    O Christ, the spring that cannot fail
    The Truth no age outgrows
    No faithful soul becomes too full
    To drink where mercy flows
    Keep me as teachable as she
    Still listening at Your feet

    I suppose that is part of what I found so encouraging about Petra’s continued enthusiasm. Not simply that they are still making music after all these years, but that there is still a visible joy in what they are doing and in the Lord they are singing about.

    And I find myself wanting something of that same spirit.

    To keep listening. To keep learning. To keep rejoicing in the goodness of God, even as the years pass and life brings its various joys and sorrows.

    I don’t imagine that every new technology or creative experiment is necessarily a good thing. Certainly, there are plenty of questions still to work through when it comes to AI and music. But I am grateful for the opportunities these tools have given me to explore the Scriptures, to engage with Augustine and other Christians who have gone before us, and to share a little of what I am learning along the way.

    And I am grateful that God has given us such different gifts, interests, and abilities through which we can encourage one another.

    Some of us play guitars. Some of us sing. Some of us write, teach, build things, or tinker with computers.

    And some of us apparently build imaginary robot amusement parks.

    There is room for quite a variety of people in the household of God!

    But whatever our gifts and whatever our tools, I hope we never become so occupied with the things we are making that we lose sight of the One who gives us every good gift.

    The fountain isn’t the music. It isn’t the technology. It isn’t even the wonderful people through whom God has encouraged us.

    It is Christ Himself, the living source of the truth, mercy, and goodness we are learning to receive.

    That brings me back to Psalm 107 and the reason I wanted to write this post in the first place.

    I am thankful for my mother and sister, for the kindness of the folks at House of Restoration, for the opportunity to meet and hear Petra, for the music that has encouraged my faith over so many years, and for the unexpected doors God has allowed me to explore through this rather unusual project.

    I am thankful for the friends and family who have shaped my life, including those I now remember with both sorrow and gratitude.

    And I am thankful that after all these years, there is still more to learn, more to discover, more to enjoy, and more reason to worship.

    Perhaps the song’s final communal chorus captures something of my hope for this project, and really for all of us:

    We are still at the fountain
    Still humble, still made new
    The deeper that we walk in faith
    The more we thirst for You

    So here we are.

    Petra is still rocking. My sister is still saying “Petra.” The robots are still singing. And I am still discovering new things to be thankful for.

    Still learning.

    Still listening.

    Still at the fountain.

    “Oh give thanks to the LORD, for He is good, For His lovingkindness is everlasting.”

    — Psalm 107:1 (NASB 1995)

  • Live Show Friday! October 2, 2026

    Live Show Friday! October 2, 2026

    I like to imagine that Augustine worked on various projects at once thinking in the present, forward and back as he considered God, himself and reality. So this evening I have a bit of a way ahead preview. A spur of the moment draft I made that I have been enjoying.

    Here is a full ALIVE show for Augustine’s work known as On the Morals of the Catholic Church. Be advised this is a draft!

    My sparky protestant side likes to call it On the Morals of the Good and True Church but that’s mostly cause I have a bit of baggage admittedly such that the word catholic can drudge up some ideas more modern than ancient. It’s a good reminder to me though that Christ’s Church is maturing and growing. “Until we all attain” so to say. We don’t always live or think as we should. Let’s all be a bit more humble and remember to live . . .

    The Life of Love

    https://suno.com/s/oTBnenQ8LUObtBfu

  • More Than She Asked (ALIVE in Des Moines Version) is out now

    More Than She Asked (ALIVE in Des Moines Version) is out now

    More Than She Asked (ALIVE in Des Moines Version) is now an official Augustinus Vox single, released September 18, 2026 and available on streaming services.

    A mother’s long prayer becomes her son’s praise. Inspired by Monica’s joy in Confessions VIII.12.30, the song follows Augustine from the news of his conversion to the window at Ostia, then opens into the shared thanksgiving of Ephesians 3. Shimmering synths, ringing guitars, and a soaring chorus carry the story in the sound of an 80s rock ballad.

    Explore the single · Read the lyrics and source notes · Listen in the Music App

    Spotify · YouTube Music · Official YouTube audio · Suno

    The single offers a first release from the forthcoming Monica project. Work on the full album continues, shaping Augustine’s memories of his mother into songs of prayer, patience, grief, and hope.

    ALIVE in Des Moines is an imagined concert presentation by an AI band, with spoken introductions and audience ambience. It is not a recording of a real concert.

  • Live Song Friday – September 18, 2026

    Live Song Friday – September 18, 2026

    Update — September 22, 2026: “More Than She Asked (ALIVE in Des Moines Version)” is now streaming as an official single, released September 18. Listen on Spotify or YouTube, or play it in the Music App. Explore the complete lyrics, meaning, and sources and single details. The full Monica album is still in progress. This ALIVE version is a simulated concert performance.

    More Than She Asked (ALIVE in Des Moines Version)

    Open “More Than She Asked” on Suno

    Source:

    From there we went in to my mother and told her; she rejoiced. We related how it had happened; she exulted and triumphed and blessed you, who are able to do beyond what we ask or understand, because she saw that you had granted her so much more concerning me than she had been accustomed to ask with wretched, tearful groans. For you converted me to yourself so that I sought neither a wife nor any hope of this world, standing upon that rule of faith in which you had revealed me to her so many years before. You turned her mourning into joy, far more abundant than she had desired and far dearer and more chaste than what she sought from grandchildren of my flesh.

    (Saint Augustine, Confessions, Book 8, Chapter 12, Section 30, Augustinus Vox Standard Version translation)
    Read this passage in Augustinus Vox Study

  • Monica Album Work Progress Report and New Site Improvements

    Update — September 22, 2026: “More Than She Asked (ALIVE in Des Moines Version)” is now out as an official single. Hear this simulated concert version and explore its lyrics and Augustine sources. Work on the full Monica album continues.

    So right now we are sitting in a consideration of the life of Saint Augustine’s mother Monica. In case you were unaware, soon after Augustine’s conversation and baptism his mother dies. The entire episode is detailed in book 9 of his Confessions.

    This has been a challenging album to work on. There is a lot of rich material and my methods and care around the album work has shifted a bit as well. I have a few song that for sure will be on the final album but others that are just not quite there.

    One thing I began to do during this phase of album creation is to have my trusty A.I. robot companion produce some daily scholarly articles on Monica and Augustine’s reflections or her from the Confessions. I like to use the text to speech mechanism in the app to listen to these on occassion.

    At some point this album will get released but really I am in no hurry and want to do right by it so I am sitting a bit longer in the material and doing a bit more producer input on this one giving myself some time to come up with more creative angles for songs.

    One especially touching part of the story of Monica is the shared vision Augustine and his mother share immediately prior to her death. It is a fascinating moment in Augustine’s writing where he details a supernatural experience of the presence of God. We would all I think do well to pray for and seek such a blessing and even more with family member or a friend. In the case of Monica and Augustine it began with a conversation considering what God had in store for His people beyond this earthly life. Here is a taste!

    Raising ourselves with a more ardent affection toward the Selfsame, we passed step by step through all bodily things and through the very heaven from which sun, moon, and stars shine upon the earth. We ascended still farther inwardly by thinking, speaking, and marveling at your works; and we came into our own minds and passed beyond them, so that we might touch the region of unfailing abundance, where you feed Israel forever upon the nourishment of truth, and where life is the Wisdom through whom all these things are made—things that have been and things that will be.

    Wow! So there something to check out. 😀

    . . .

    At the same time I have been on a crazy coding agent kick.

    In case you did not know, the A.I. tools have significantly improved over the past half a year both in accuracy and capability. I began to tinker with OpenAI’s Codex tool, another tool called OpenCode as well as Anthropic’s Claude Code. I also expanded into testing out Gemini functionality. Still primarily I use the kleenex of A.I. ChatGPT.

    One significant area of help that has occurred by use of coding tools is the ability to really improve the site and data around my albums and songs. If you visit the site and explore you will see this. We now have lyrics for every song published on our site. VOX has been very hard at work. We added album and song pages and even meanings for the songs to help folks dig deeper into the songs and Augustine’s thought.

    To add a little humor we added a little VOX001 ticker at the bottom of most pages. He shares a little dry Augustine humor. Some of it is funny. Some of it is a groan but still kinda funny lol.

    One huge release on the site is the Study tool. It’s quickly becoming my favorite. It is basically an entire application built into the site that provides a library of public domain texts and translations. It even provides a little music player for study sessions and ability to play back some works in a synthetic text to speech voice that is pretty darn good if I don’t say so myself which I guess I just did.

    I also was able to enlist some additional human help from one of my younger brothers who helped to enter some song pages and provided some helpful feedback on the site looking for bugs. Thank you Jonathan bro!

    All this to say the new album is progressing and do please feel free to check out also all the new things on the site. These tools are so cool and can allow us so many new ways to learn and explore. I am very grateful. God is good.

    Peace!

  • Remembrance on a Friday night

    Recently I got the fun opportunity to hang out with some siblings at a concert. It was awesome! It is so hard these days to catch time with family with so many important things folks have on the daily with family and work and life.

    During that time I got a question about the music. I cannot recall exactly what it was, but I remember it had something to do with listening to one’s own music. It was a good comment and a reminder of the danger of pride and of narcissism. It is likely something many of us struggle with to varying degrees.

    What this made me think about days later was how these songs and this project are really about remembering. Here in Augustine we recall the church of the past and try to give them a voice in the present. It isn’t perfect; it is totally robot tech, and I don’t have any illusions about having any special mojo to make this happen. It is just a matter of care and tinkering and I suspect some small amount of providence given how the project has affected me personally. If you enjoy it I am glad to have you here and if you don’t I hope God softens your heart a little to hear something from someone sometime to be blessed in an incredible way.

    And all that to say one thing that is so wonderful about faith and life in Jesus Christ, hard as it also is, is the reflection on his church and the activity of remembering who we are and what we are and where we have been and how great and kind a God we have, who condescends that he might save and rescue each one.

    So on this Friday night we are remembering a few things:

    Moments with family and friends

    Good songs that helped us through tough times

    Other good songs that challenged and encouraged

    The moments in life that challenge us to really grow beyond [fill in the blank]

    God for his salvation and kindness

    It’s no wonder the Psalmist in Psalm 107 said let us give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his kindness toward the children of men. Let the redeemed of the Lord say so! And that is followed by a list of situations mostly created by individual sin. One reminder there is to call on him in our distress.

    Time to remember some old school salvation Augustinus Vox style. 😊

  • He Became Small

    Here is a little sentimental experiment late on a Friday night. In a moment of reflection I was reminded of another moment many years ago that ended with me finding and reading a moving passage.

    The passage began in this way:

    “To restore man, who had been laid low by sin, to the heights of divine glory, the Word of the eternal Father, though containing all things within His immensity, willed to become small.”

    In the remembering I decided to make this little album:

    The Word Became Small

    https://suno.com/playlist/466f7983-1d5a-4e47-b4e8-d8aca52d3096

  • From Milan to Ostia: After the Water and the Voyage Ahead

    From Milan to Ostia: Instrumental Meditations


    Our newest Augustinus Vox album is a new instrumental project called From Milan to Ostia: Instrumental Meditations.

    The album traces Saint Augustine’s journey immediately after his baptism in Milan in 387 A.D. That moment was one of joy, release, and a new beginning. Augustine later remembered it this way:

    “And we were baptized, and our anxiety about our former life fled away. In those days I could not get enough of the wonderful sweetness I felt as I considered the depth of your plan for the salvation of the human race.”

    But the joy of baptism was not the end of the story.

    After Milan, Augustine traveled south with his mother Monica toward Ostia, the port city of Rome. They intended to sail back to Africa. Instead, Ostia became the place of one of the most beautiful and heartbreaking scenes in the Confessions.

    Augustine writes:

    “There, far from the crowds, after the weariness of our long journey, we were regaining strength for the voyage ahead.”

    That “voyage ahead” was supposed to be the trip home. But for Monica, unexpectedly, it became the journey into the next life.

    Before her death, Monica told Augustine:

    “My God has granted me this far more fully, because I now see you as his servant, despising earthly happiness. What am I doing here?”

    That line became one of the emotional centers of the album. Monica had prayed for Augustine for years. She had followed him, wept for him, pleaded for him, and hoped for him. And now, after seeing him baptized and turned toward God, her deepest earthly hope had been fulfilled.

    This album is meant to sit inside that space: the quiet after baptism, the road south through Italy, the rest at Ostia, the window overlooking the garden, and the farewell Augustine would never forget.

    Because the album is instrumental, there are no lyrics telling the listener what to think. Instead, the music tries to meditate on the movement of the story itself: joy, pilgrimage, rest, memory, and loss.

    Tracklist

    1. After the Water

    The album opens in the stillness after baptism. The old anxiety has fled, and Augustine stands at the beginning of a new life.

    2. Farewell to Milan

    A reflective departure from the city of baptism, Ambrose, and new faith. Joy is still present, but the road is already calling.

    3. The Little Company

    Augustine does not travel alone. This track imagines the small circle of family and companions moving together after the great turning point.

    4. Southward Through Italy

    The journey begins to stretch across the land. The music follows the movement from Milan toward Rome, carrying both hope and fatigue.

    5. Psalms for the Journey

    Augustine remembered the sweetness of God’s salvation after baptism. This track imagines prayer, song, and meditation accompanying the road.

    6. The Port of Rome

    Ostia appears as the threshold between lands, seas, and lives. It is a place of waiting, rest, and preparation for the voyage ahead.

    7. Window of Ascent

    At Ostia, Augustine and Monica share a moment of spiritual vision at a window overlooking a garden. This track meditates on that quiet ascent of the soul.

    8. Earthly Hopes Fulfilled

    Monica has seen what she longed to see: Augustine as God’s servant, no longer clinging to earthly happiness. Her deepest hope has been answered.

    9. Before the Tears

    Before Augustine’s grief breaks open, there is a sacred stillness. This track lingers in the space just before farewell becomes unavoidable.

    10. The Unfinished Voyage

    The planned voyage to Africa remains unfinished for Monica. Her journey turns beyond this life, leaving Augustine with memory, grief, and hope.

    From Milan to Ostia is not only a journey across Italy.

    It is a journey from water to farewell, from earthly hope to eternal longing, from the joy of baptism to the mystery of the voyage beyond.

  • Reflections on the Post-baptism Journey to Ostia on the Tiber

    And we were baptized, and our anxiety about our former life fled away.

    In those days I could not get enough of the wonderful sweetness I felt as I considered the depth of your plan for the salvation of the human race.

    We were asking what place would be best for us to serve you, and together we were returning to Africa.

    And while we were at Ostia on the Tiber, my mother died. I pass over much because I am hurrying.

    There [at Ostia on the Tiber], far from the crowds, after the weariness of our long journey, we were regaining strength for the voyage ahead.

    Here we have a few quotations from Book 9 of the Confessions which instruct us on where our journey with Augustine will next take us. We will move from the city of Milan in northern Italy to the south towards the port of Rome referred to as Ostia. Augustine does not tell us much about the trip but it would have been a much longer journey than our previous journey from the countryside of Cassiciacum to Milan. That earlier trip might have taken at most 3 days, whereas the trip to Ostia, we expect, may have taken about a month.

    It is fascinating to me that many of the places mentioned by Augustine still exist today as we have a modern-day Milan, Rome and Ostia. You can even plan a trip if you wish to copy the journey yourself today on Google Maps, though admittedly Google couldn’t find me a way there from Des Moines lol.

    If, however, I start from Milan and plan a trip to Rome and then Ostia, I can get some sense of their potential journey.

    This is not to say of course that modern roads correspond to where ancient roads would have taken Augustine and his little company. In fact we know something of the roads of that time and more than likely the journey was not nearly as direct as a car trip would be today. For certain it would not be a mere 7-8 hours but as mentioned about a month-long journey.

    Imagine what that might have looked like for our little band of travelers: Augustine at age 33, his mother Monica at age 56, Augustine’s teenage son Adeodatus, his brother Navigius, Evodius, possibly even Alypius and perhaps a few unnamed persons. We know this was likely the company due to clues in the text of Confessions Book 9, which explicitly mentions those names and references friends and household at the time of Monica’s death and immediately prior.

    The text doesn’t tell us too much of the journey so we will let our minds imagine a bit. What it does tell us, however, is that, as they left, they were experiencing a joy at their recent baptism and that ahead of them was a long, tiresome journey that resulted in a pause at Ostia followed by an unexpected time of grieving due to the untimely death of Monica.

    In fact Augustine relates that prior to her death Monica actually spoke to him in a kind of foreshadowing way about how all her aims in life were fulfilled in seeing those she cared about come to know Christ. He recalls that she put it this way:

    My son, as far as I am concerned, I no longer take delight in anything in this life. What I am still doing here, and why I am still here, I do not know, for every hope I had in this world is now used up.

    There was only one reason I wanted to remain a little longer in this life: so that before I died I might see you as a Catholic Christian. My God has granted me this far more fully, because I now see you as his servant, despising earthly happiness.

    What am I doing here?

    Soon after saying this Monica will become ill and die and pass into glory.

    So in considering where we go next on our journey I plan to do another instrumental album. It will take us on this journey from the spiritual heights experienced at Milan on a journey to Ostia on the Tiber. We will stop before Monica’s death but will look to foreshadow it. After this we will move into another lyric album specifically on Monica and Augustine’s remembrance of her.

    In doing a little fun imagining with the A.I. I was able to come up with a pretty cool map of the journey. It started with a first draft and quickly moved into our 80s vibe. Here they are for your enjoyment.

    First Draft

    Second draft 80s rock edition

    To see more about where we have come from and where we are going, you can listen to Confessions Book 9 yourself here:

  • Celebratory Piano Sounds (new album: Piano Sessions)

    Well it’s official!

    The publish button has been hit on our newest album:

    Piano Sessions

    You can click the album cover above to begin listening to the album on Suno without any ads. I expect the album will soon arrive on Spotify, iTunes, YouTube, Amazon and other stores.

    Click here for Spotify

    So a little about this album…

    It has been under construction for quite some time. Longer than any album I’ve worked on previously for sure. The album is really a celebration of the journey so far with Augustine and Augustinus Vox. I had hoped to release it on my birthday last week on April 19 but normal human festivities prevailed, for which I’m grateful as there were some additional changes I made and testing I did even in the last week.

    One of the major late changes was a decision to modify the opening song of the album. I originally intended to begin the album with a Piano version of the opening song from our Soliloquies album called Opening Prayer. This was the shape of the album for quite some time but in a moment of recollection I began to recall an older song I’d made back in some early experiments with Against the Skeptics called To My Friend Romanianus. I couldn’t get away from the song and it became the opener Receive this Song. I found it to be a sort of dedication to any who might venture along this journey with me. 🙂

    History of the Opener: Receive This Song

    Some time after that album was released I was experimenting further with the ideas after releasing On Order. I decided it might be a neat experiment to try to do draft albums for each book of Contra Academicos that were more faithful to the text of the work and call it something like Contra Academicos: The Complete Journey.

    [Disclaimer: If you want to listen to it you can do so by clicking here but be warned unlike our published albums this has little to no QA. I call it a draft album.]

    The idea was forming that perhaps a good way to learn Augustine was to work with his ideas in a variety of degrees. First a lighter album and then on to something a bit more dense. Learning topics of theology and philosophy is hard for me and I find the music a helpful way to engage with the ideas and appropriate them. Regardless, that draft album was pretty cool on the listen-through, enough that I sent it to a friend. I continue to work with Contra Academicos to this day and have an idea that it might make a pretty entertaining stage play were it infused with a bit of 80s rock and humor.

    More on Piano Sessions

    So how did we get from 80s rock to Piano? Well, I enjoy a variety of music styles and I enjoyed the idea of Vox and band making me an album for my birthday to celebrate all the work we’ve put into the project. You’ll find in Piano Sessions many covers of some of my favorite songs that we’ve created over the last year as well as a few new original songs which I also call Piano Sessions Version because they all originate from an 80s rock version. Some have little echoes of their source as a rock ballad which is quite surprising at times. Additionally there are a few unique ones in there that are sure to be favorites of someone out there.

    An Overview of the Originals

    Receive This Song

    Receive This Song as mentioned is the opener to the album. The song is drawn from the opening of Contra Academicos where Augustine writes to his patron and friend Romanianus.

    Light-Giver of the Dawn

    This is the second original song on the album that comes at the end of the first half of the album. It comes from an ancient hymn attributed to Hilary of Poitiers.

    Orabo

    Orabo is actually a hymn fragment attributed to Saint Ambrose. In our Ambrosian Hymns album this song is what is behind Heart and Spirit. The term Orabo means “I will pray” which is how that hymn fragment begins. Orabo was first published in its rock form on Suno and on YouTube. You can listen below. A fantastic instrumental!

    I Will Pray (Orabo Interlude)

    This song comes as a short interlude. It is a cover of our instrumental Orabo above but with the lyrics of the hymn fragment I quite enjoyed.

    And finally…

    The First and the Last

    This song is probably my favorite on the album and I can never wait to get to it. It originated from our exploration of the works of Ambrose. Specifically it came out of experiments with Ambrose’s Hexameron.

    Well, all this to say, I hope you enjoy this new album. I know I sure do.

    Thank you as always for listening and reading!!

    Until the next sounds drop!

    -Kyle